The PERFECT day

Sigh.

Today was a wonderful day.

Things have been a bit busy, so I had not had time to post before today to give much of a heads up, but my Punky Loo turned seven today.

Birthdays around here are pretty special. The first part of the Benny Birthday Traditions starts the night before, as I get everything perfectly prepared for the big day. I always stay up way too late reminiscing and writing out a very wordy and mushy card to my beloved child. Then I take a picture of them asleep in their beds – a tradition I started 6 years ago on the eve of Punky’s first birthday – to commemorate the last time I will see my baby at the age they are leaving behind. Then we head to bed and my mind swims and I sleep restlessly all night as I think over so much of life, love, parenting and my baby. Daddy takes the Big Day off of work (mostly because Mommy insists that these days count as national holidays around here, and since he writes his own schedule, it’s just sort of an understood) and the whole day revolves around the Birthday Boy (and soon enough to be Birthday Girl, though we’ve yet to go down that road in our parenting career!) and all of his wishes, wants and needs. Birthday Boy starts the day with a run into Mommy and Daddy’s room to snuggle in bed while waiting for the rest of the house to wake up. Then we all head downstairs and Birthday Boy sees a few mylar balloons floating in the living room, plus a handful of gifts sitting on the coffee table wrapped and ready to be opened. We all wait with baited breath as gifts that have been long thought out and worked on are opened and marveled over. It’s a fun time.

The Birthday Boy always chooses the Birthday Menu, so breakfast is already planned and ready to start. The usual Birthday Breakfast Favorite is my homemade cinnamon rolls, which we thoroughly enjoyed this morning. Today’s choice meals also included grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch and chicken and dumplings for dinner.

We do parties often enough around here, but it’s not an annual thing for each child each year (that would be a lot of party for one Mommy to orchestrate and pull off since our birthdays hit one after another for pretty much the first seven months of the year!), so sometimes it’s a mellow family day, other times it’s a party day. And, though my husband and I differ here in our opinions, even if you have a party on a weekend day separate from your actual birthday, the actual day is still recognized in full as its own special day. The party is just a bonus. The actual full and sentimental celebration is on the real day.

So that is the basic rundown of a typical birthday for one of my kiddos. They hear the birthday song sung several times throughout the day. They get candles on most of their foods. They just get to feel plain old special all day long.

But onto the specifics of this particular wonderful day.

Last night Punky went to bed with just the littlest bit of sadness over the loss of being six, and the fear of beginning life as a seven year old, but we managed to squeak by without too many tears and he did go to bed in pretty good spirits and ready to take on the world come morning. Well, actually he was ready to take on the world at about 2am. But we sent his happy, wide awake self right back to bed and told him it was NOWHERE NEAR MORNING!

But, come actual morning, Punky slid right into our bed all full of life and light. He was so thrilled to be the Big Man of the day.

And boy, was it a great day!

He was delighted with his gifts, and we all had a fun time watching as he raced around the house with the note card clues I’d written up for his first ever birthday gift treasure hunt. He got a new bike for his birthday, which is a pretty big deal. So he followed clues all around the house until he ended up in the downstairs hall closet (otherwise known as the Lego room around here) where his bright yellow big-kid bike sat waiting for him, big red bows and all. Boy was he surprised!

He devoured the cinnamon rolls and couldn’t wait to get out the door to try that bike out with Daddy and the other boys. I hung out while Girly Pie napped and they rode around in the gray morning fog. The bike worked great.

He was so sweet all day and just a delight, though that’s his general MO anyway. He loved his lunch and requested his special cake (Batman, like Finny’s was last month) to go with lunch rather than after dinner.

Then he got a special treat when Daddy took him in his truck and they drove to a local bike trail (30 minutes away, so only sort of local, I guess) and they took a real Big Guy bike ride together. I don’t think our boy had ever had the chance to really ride hard and fast before today. He’s always had to wait for mommies pushing strollers or little brothers catching their breath or stopping to check out the scenery. So to get out just him and his dad, well, it was a pretty neat thing for him today.

He also got to blow some saved up money on a new Lego kit on the way home, which was a huge thrill for him. And one more surprise awaited him when he got home… his Grampa (my dad) had balloons and a gift basket sent for his birthday. So he was thrilled to come home to such a fun treat.

The only sad part of the day was poor Finny getting left behind for the bike ride, but he handled it well (thanks to his favorite movie!) though he was pretty lonely for his big brother by the time they got home.

Punky was happy all day long. It was one of those birthdays that you just know he’ll actually remember. The year he got his own brand new bike. The year he had to follow a trail of clues to find his big gift. The year it was actually sunny (in mid February – an event in and of itself!) and he got to ride on the bike trail with Dad. The year his cake looked like Batman. The year Grampa sent that huge basket full of goodies and two Lego kits! The year when Girly Pie was still a baby and she laughed at everything I did. The year his best friend Logan couldn't be with him on his birthday because L's mom had a nasty flu bug.

Seven. It’s just so big, and so little, all at the same time. He will actually remember things that happen to him at this age, and probably quite a few of them with pretty good clarity. He’s hitting his stride of childhood. Everything is fun. He’s old enough to be accountable for the fun he has and the choices he makes, but young enough to not have too terribly many responsibilities to weigh him down, either. He’s vaguely aware that time is slipping by, but he’s thrilled to just be here right now. He’s so mature and so capable of helping out and making the right choice. He knows right from wrong 9 times out of 10, and man does he have some "WOW!" things to say! He can keep up with the theology in the Narnia books and has a real love for God. But then the next moment, he’s just a goofy little boy who laughs at potty humor and still wants to read his baby brother’s board books while he uses the bathroom (TMI, I’m sure – but it’s just too funny to see this big kid head to the potty with an Eric Carle book for a nice relaxing sit-down!).

So yes, it was a wonderful day. A perfect day. It started out right, and ended right. And every step of the way my boy enjoyed himself and felt special and loved and blessed.

And how am I doing you ask? Well, I admit that more often than not I have some pangs of loss at birthday time – to let go of the joy that was and face the uncertainly of what is to come just niggles a bit for me. And particularly with my oldest, it’s just often a bit of a reality check as I realize that each year, no matter how young the baby is that I may be holding in my arms, my big boy is still going to grow up and move on. This season will end, some day. And birthdays, though so full of joy and celebration, always bring those thoughts up to the surface in a very tangible way for me.

But, I was surprised to find that this year, with Punky’s seventh birthday, I didn’t have as much of that as I often do. Today, and even leading up to it, I really honestly have been at peace. When that boy turned five I thought I was going to lose it – that was the peak of realizing that he was no longer a baby and he was going to grow up no matter what I did. But for some reason, seven is just perfect. He’s already proven himself a “big boy” so it wasn’t shocking to me to realize he’s no longer a baby. But he’s still young enough to seem like a little boy.

I don’t know quite how to put words to it, but he just seems to be just right right now. He fits himself perfectly. He’s big enough and small enough all at the same time. And you can see it in him, too. You can just tell that he is finding himself, and that he feels just right. So today, it was all happiness and peace, and no trepidation and anxiety.

Today I celebrated fully my seven years of motherhood and I basked in the glow of watching my boy shine brightly. He’s a pretty amazing boy, and I feel blessed to have him call me Mom. And though I know that the vast majority of the fine young man I see in him just came with the package, I do feel like we’ve done a pretty good job along the way with that boy. So it’s nice to feel like it’s all working out.

So happy seventh birthday, Punky Loo. I love you so much, my little Big Man.