The real me

I want to explain here that in my last post – the one where I accomplished so many tasks in a day – that is not the norm for me. Actually, that is why I posted it. I felt so good after having had such a productive day that I felt like seeing it all in print.

Just in case you somehow got the impression that I might in fact have such days on a regular basis. Because I in fact do not.

Most days I don’t even know what I’m cooking for breakfast until I’m puttering around in the kitchen at 6-something and seeing what is there to serve up. I’ve started a somewhat consistent breakfast menu for Mondays through Fridays, so I just pick one of five choices, and that has helped. But by nature, I’m generally a last minute kinda gal.

Lunch and dinner are no better. Planning is not my forte.

Most of my days are spent in moving from one necessary activity to another. By necessary activity, I guess I mean whatever seems most important in the moment. In the morning that usually means getting breakfast made, served, eaten and cleaned up. I usually get laundry going in that time, too. Somewhere in there I direct children who might not be on track with their chores, but mostly I just do my morning work and hang out a bit with the two little guys.

Once Girly Pie naps, I do try to get school stuff in with Punky and Finny, but that can be hit or miss, depending on Goose’s mood and the general tone of the day. And then later when Goose naps I try to get some more done. I’ve been trying to get some semblance of history study in, but I’m finding that it might just be a lost cause, at least for my children at these ages and stages of life. So I’m going to make efforts to figure out in the next year what “school” will look like for our family. Though I have loved the idea of Sonlight, this is the second year I have tried and failed at making it work for our family, so for the time being I think it is time to move on and explore new horizons for our home learning experience.

Really, I do enjoy my days, and I feel like most of my energy goes into caring for and loving on my children. I work hard to impart good Godly character in my children, and that does take up a big chunk of my efforts each day. I also try to really get in some time with the babies, because I know how finite their very young months and years are, and I’m not willing to let them slip by completely while I was busy doing other things.

So, lest you think that I have it all together and just get up each morning knowing just what the day will bring and just how I am going to accomplish it all, I just wanted to clearly state that that is not at all the case. I am winging it just as much as anyone. Thankfully, I just happen to very much enjoy what I do, so even when I feel as though I’m failing miserably at any part of it (not good enough with teaching the kids, not keeping the house in good enough order, not making enough one-on-one time with any of the kids, not being on top of planning or organizing ANYTHING) it doesn’t generally get to me. I do have weak days where I feel like I’m failing at everything, and those can be hard. But with good friends (thank you Mary Grace!), strong faith, a very loving and forgiving God, amazing children and a super supportive husband, those blips do tend to wash over pretty quickly. And I always come back to a place of peace, knowing that I am doing just what I need to be doing at this point in our family. That's probably one of the biggest things I have going for me - I just have a pretty positive attitude and genuinely feel blessed to be living this life. The title of my blog? Psalm 118:24? Yeah, that's what gets me through everything. I am just so thankful for TODAY.

So sure, I could do better at any of it, or at all of it. But what it comes right down to it, my kids are happy, healthy and bright, my husband seems content (though it’s hard to read him sometimes…) and I feel pretty good myself. I am blessed to live this life, and when it comes right down to it, I believe that loving others, and loving the life God has blessed you with, is a pretty great place to find yourself.

So there you go - the real, flawed, disorganized, procrastinating, occasionally slothful but always thankful -Me. Maybe next time I have one of those days when I barely keep everyone afloat for the day I’ll have to post that, too.

But hey – it sure is nice when I have those days when I get a zillion things done. ;o)