Ramblings...

It's Friday. It's raining outside and I can hear my two big boys upstairs in their "quiet" rest time (I use the term quiet loosely here... Finny in particular is, I think, the loudest person that God has created on this earth... though Goose might be a close second.) as they jumble about and play with their Playmobil guys and Lincoln Logs. I think frontier forts with pirates and knights battling it out with a pack of dollar store plastic policemen (like little army guys only they're police) is the current theme of most of their bedroom play time. Oh, and last I checked there was a handful of little Indians and a plastic gorilla involved, too. And one monster truck.

Goose is finally napping. He's skipped nap for the past two days, so I am very happy for him (and myself) that he's napping today. Thankfully when he skips nap he still somehow manages to be quiet and happy in his bed for two hours, give or take. Alone. Sounds pretty amazing, huh? Might make you think I have this whole Mommy thing down to have a two year old who will play alone in his bed quietly for two hours, right? Well don't be fooled. It took getting through two very finicky sleepers who have always loved waking up hours before dawn and fought sleep terribly for most of their infant and toddler development before God obviously felt sorry enough for me that he threw me a bone and gave me one who actually likes sleep and quiet time. Thank you for that, Lord. ;o)

Girly Pie is also down for a nap. My girl has the first speck of her first tooth showing through today. It's bittersweet, the whole first teeth thing. It's so great on one hand, to see them growing and developing so well. Those two tooth grins are just stinkin' adorable, too. But on the other hand, my baby girl is getting bigger much more quickly than I anticipated that she would. I mean, she was just born, like yesterday, right? Surely that's not my baby that is just spitting distance from the six month mark. Surely not. She can't possible be heading into the second half of her first year ALREADY, can she? But alas, it's true. And as much as I have enjoyed her early babyhood, I know I'll enjoy these coming months (and years) even more. She's just a delight, and such a blessing to us all. And as much as I'll miss that toothless, gummy little piggy grin she's been flashing for months, I know that new toothy little smile will completely melt my heart.

We've done a good bit of school this week, in that Punky and Finny both learned a lot even if I did sort of toss the workbooks aside more days than not. Punky is working on telling time with an analog clock. It's been fun guessing times together and playing a game I made up to help cement his fives times table (Do they still call them times tables? Or is that way out of date?) so he can easily look at a clock face and see the minute hand's location and know what time it is.

Oh, and we've played hangman. I loved that game when I was a kid. I can't say I know for sure where Punky learned how to play it, though I think Sunday school is the best bet. But I know for sure I didn't teach it to him! I started seeing him draw gallows with little unhappy men hanging from nooses on the steamy shower glass and figured he'd been playing the game for a while. So now we pull out our little mini dry erase board and play hangman on there a lot. Even Finny loves to get in on this game. He's our little artist and he's very particular about the features drawn on the little fellow dangling from the rope. He must have hair, you see. And not curly hair. Straight hair. And eyes, a mouth, ears, a body, arms and legs, AND feet and hands. And if he's really lucky Mommy will give the guy a peg leg, a hook hand and one patched eye. Then it's really fun, even when you're not really winning. Of course Finny can barely read and neither boy can spell worth beans. But we have a great time regardless.

We've also been learning about ancient Egypt. That's been fun. I can't believe how much I have learned while teaching my FIRST GRADER that I swear I was not taught even in high school. Seriously! And yesterday my boys both brought out chapter books that we'd read before and each boy wanted to start a new book. I love that. Finny wants Dr. Dolittle and Punky wants Mr. Popper's Penguins. It's just so fun to see them drop their Legos and Playmobil guys and home made cardboard swords (Punky's current favorite craft item) and grab a beloved book and beg me to start reading it NOW! So we'll be starting a new book soon, now that we've finished our current read aloud. So all in all, it's been a good week full of fun and learning.

And today is Halloween. That's a borderline holiday for us. We don't do the trick or treating, nor do we go out and buy costumes. But the kids do dig out from their bountiful collection of dressup clothes and hand out candy with bible verses attached to them to the trick or treaters in the neighborhood. They seem quite happy with this arrangement. It's not a holiday I feel great about honoring at all, in that I can't see that it brings much glory to God, but then I did grow up doing the whole thing and it was fun and I didn't turn out bad. So that's our middle ground. Hopefully they never feel like they've missed out on all that much. Really. I mean it is cold and wet out there anyway. And we let them eat the candy we bought. So it works out in the end. We also have our good friends coming over to share in the fun with us, and we'll be making some cookies together to boot.

So there's my rambling update of today. Oh, and my hubby's baby brother just became a father last night! His wife gave birth to their son at 9:52pm on October 30. He was 6 pounds, 15 ounces, and that was 11 days overdue. So just a little peanut of a guy! But we are thrilled for them and can't wait to meet our newest nephew/cousin. They only live an hour away, so we'll see them soon enough! And also we are so thrilled to get to meet Mary Grace and clan's newest addition, little Mr. Manolin. They're the lovely friends coming over today. We are so excited for them and can't wait to see this smiley, giggly little man we've heard so much about!

Ok, so NOW I am done rambling. ;o) Just a rambling, rainy kind of afternoon, I guess. I'm one blessed and happy woman. It's a wonderful life! And at this moment, I'm just so thankful for it all!

You mean that counts as SCHOOL!?!?!

I'm a homeschooler. My children consider me Mom and Teacher. It's all blurry though, the line between the two.

And I think that's a good thing most of the time.

Last week my sister in law called me to ask a question about some maternity clothes I had lent her. While we were on the phone she heard me talking to my boys about the book on CD they were listening to and asked me if I could suggest any good chapter books she could start reading with her six year old daughter and her four year old son.

She didn't have a clue what she was getting herself into.

I'm sure she expected me to mention a book, maybe two, that we had read and enjoyed together. What she got was a muddled conversation punctuated with "Ooh. And this book!" and "I forgot about that one. " and "OH, have you read THIS one?" and "you MUST try THIS book. They'd LOVE this one!" And after that conversation, she also received an email with a very long list of books that I remembered after hanging up the phone.

My list of chapter books that my boys have enjoyed is full of books I had never heard of as a child and had never read until I had children of my own. It's a list that I was shocked to look at as I sent the email along. My oldest is only six, after all. And that was just the quick list of books that we had really enjoyed from our Sonlight cores, one Winter Promise year and some random suggestions from friends or finds from the library (plus the Chronicles of Narnia, which I did enjoy as a child myself).

And as I wrote them down for her, I was so excited to share the wealth of joy and laughter and fun and tears we'd gotten from all those books. I realized that I had really taken all of that for granted.

We are in first grade at our upper end of school here in Benny's house. And I admit that with three children not even on the books for "school" that there are days we struggle to officially learn anything school-like. I mostly use Sonlight thanks to Mary Grace and her generosity and example. We do skip the books that do not draw us in, and we add in other read alouds that inspire us. We do our own math, language arts, science (when we do any of that at all) and even most of our own Bible. I don't think Punky even reads most of their readers at this point, since we just get our own books from the library for him. So I often wonder why we use Sonlight at all, when I have to work so hard to get all the basics of school in on top of what we read for our core.

But that day as I listed all the books that had brought so much excitement and adventure into our lives, I realized that most of the fun reading we've ever done has actually been school. We usually do not think of it as such. And there are definitely some Sonlight books that we've read for history that we've just done for the sake of checking off the box. But all those read alouds, all those books... I never would have known about most of them had it not been for using Sonlight.

And I felt bad for my sister in law, who does not homeschool (they go to a Waldorf school, which I happen to think is a pretty neat alternative to standard private schools) and does not have the same access to the options of really good books that are out there.

So, all this to say how blessed we are. And I didn't even know it! I just did it. We see the book listed, we read it, we enjoy it to pieces, then we move onto the next one. So today I am very grateful for the opportunities we've had to explore the world of reading with a handy list of some of the best literature written for children (and adults!). And my kids love it, and we think of it as our free time to read most of it.

And now I get to smile and feel good about myself. I guess we've done a lot more school over the years than I had realized. I guess that even if we stick to our low key, almost-but-not-quite-unschool approach, we'll be bringing Sonlight (or at least some of it) along for the ride.

And in case you were curious, I've listed some of our favorites here, in case you are looking for a good book that your six and unders might enjoy.

My Father’s Dragon - Ruth Stiles Gannett
Elmer and the Dragon - “ “ “

Dragons of Blueland - “ “ “
Gooseberry Park – Cynthia Rylant

Mrs. Piggle Wiggle – Betty MacDonald
Mr. Popper’s Penguins – Richard and Florence Atwater
Dr. Dolittle – Hugh Lofting
Capyboppy – Bill Peet

The Hundred Dresses – Eleanor Estes

In Grandma’s Attic – Arleta Richardson

Boxcar Children – Gertrude Chandler Warner

Wonderful Wizard of Oz – L. Frank Baum

Ereth’s Birthday – Avi (this one brought my Punky to tears at 4, it's a bit intense, but worth it)

Dolphin Adventure – Wayne Grover
Dolphin Treasure – “ “ “
Chronicles of Narnia – C. S. Lewis

Any advice?

As you may or may not have noticed if you've ever looked in on my blog before, I am the mother of three older sons and one baby girl. I truly believe God knew what he was doing when he gave us our three sons before he blessed us with a daughter. I do not believe I was ready to be the mother to our Girly Pie that she needed when I first became a parent.

(Now, in all honestly, I can't really say that I feel all that well prepared to be the mother of my sons, either.)

But somehow with my daughter, I just feel a new kind of pressure and responsibility.

So, this brings me to the point of my request here. I have read lots on mothering boys. I really enjoy Dr. Dobson's Bringing Up Boys (thank you MG!) in particular. I have also heard of Raising Modern Day Knights, though have not read that yet. I really want to bring our sons up to be strong, honorable, Godly gentlemen with a good work ethic and respect for others, and I want them to know how to treat a lady with care and respect. I hope that they will be blessed with wonderful wives someday whom they will love and cherish, and I pray that they will be wonderful husbands and fathers just as God calls them to be. I feel that between the books, the Bible, our friends, and our parents, my husband and I can do alright there.

But now we have a daughter. And as I read other posts on daughters and the trials that face them, I admit that even though she is a mere 5 months old, I begin to worry for her purity and the struggle to come for her to stay pure and to keep her integrity. This world does not model at all what we want for our daughter when she comes into womanhood. But I can't even say I know what it is we should be striving for in raising our little girl.

SO... the point at last... I come to you to see if anyone has some great suggestions on resources to better prepare my husband and I to raise a Godly daughter. I am not even sure what defines a Godly woman. It seems so much easier to define a Godly man. Is it just me?

So is there any advice out there? Any books? Videos? Specific Bible references that will help me?

I really want to be purposeful in how we raise our children. I feel like we've been doing pretty well so far, and I do see the beginnings of Little Gentlemen growing in our house already. But when I look ahead to what will be coming even in the next couple of years with our daughter, I feel very ill equipped to guide her down the path towards God and His plans for her.

Any advice or suggestions at all would be greatly appreciated. She is such a gift, such a sweet, pure little girl. I know she will be a woman someday. And I just want to do everything I can while she's still here, safe in our nest and willing to learn from us, to guide her down the right path to Him and His plan. I know there is only so much I can do, and that in the end that will be between Girly Pie and her Maker. But I also feel like there is a lot we can do now as her parents to make that a less painful transition for her when the time comes for her to make her own adult choices.

So. Advise and suggest away. I am all ears.

Happy Birthday to you!

Happy Birthday to you!

Happy Birthday Dear Mary Grace!

Happy Birthday to you!

Happy birthday to the very best friend in the whole, entire world. I love you Mary Grace!

Before I forget...

While I was overhearing my three boys playing with their dinosaurs which were attacking one another...

Punky: Look Finny. The meat eaters are attacking them.

Me (always the homeschooler): Boys, do you remember what meat eaters are called?

Punky: Carnivores.

Me: Right. Do you remember what the plant eaters are called?

(pause.)

Punky: Meatloaf?

Me (stifling a chuckle): Well, yes Punk, I suppose to the carnivores, they would be considered meatloaf. I was thinking of herbivore, myself. Thanks, Bud.

Kids say the darnedest things, huh?

Sweetness

Just a quick post to say how absolutely cute and adorable and wonderful my children are!

Girly Pie was just a smiling cutie pie all day long. She has figured out this whole napping thing recently, and that is lovely. She has always been a long napper, but has just recently mastered napping in her crib (rather than on my body or in her swing) and going to sleep smoothly without needing to be completely nursed to sleep. So with nice regular-ish naps, she is just happy as a clam when she's awake. She started rolling over last week, and is so pleased with her self whenever she can do it. And I love, love, LOVE this stage when they reach for your face and pet your cheeks and try to kiss you all over and eat you up with big, wet, toothless baby kisses. Mmm. She is just edible right now.

And Goose... two year olds are really such a mixed bag, aren't they? Not too long ago I was posting about how trying he was and how defiant he was in his attempts to gain his independence in toddlerhood. And now? Well, now Goose is right back to being the darling Golden Child of the house. He says the cutest little things and all of us, big brothers included, just delight in meal time conversations right now, as he parrots random words and phrases he picks up from our discussions. He's irresistible in his bright eyed excitement... when he wants your attention, he'll get right in your face (within an inch or two) and widen his eyes beyond what seems natural, and jabber semi-intelligibly some long, exciting thing, with only one or two clear key words to clue you into what exactly it is he's so excited about. It's very cute. And when he says "MOMMY!?" and gets right up in there with a little pucker on his lips, to plant the sweetest little kiss on my lips? Well. He's just such a goose right now.

And then there is my Finny. He is so delightful to watch in action when he's in good spirits. And though he goes through rough patches, as a general rule he's in a good mood more often than not. Today he was watching a little live action fire truck video with Goose while I prepped some school stuff (gotta love Dave and his live action series!) and in the middle of it he ran off and grabbed some paper and coloring supplies. Now Finny is not a man to miss a second of any movie. So I figured it had to be something good. Sure enough, by the end of the 30 minute video he had drawn a really wonderful picture of a firetruck racing to a burning building. He had colored the firetruck in fine detail just as he'd seen on the video, but I was even more impressed with the background. It's one thing for my boy to draw an impressive item. He's quite artistic and loves to draw daily. But usually he just draws the item of interest and moves on to a new piece of paper and a new interesting item. But this picture had the detailed truck along with an impressive background. And on top of all that, he named the fire fighter driving the fire truck. Apparently his name was David. And Finny sounded and wrote it out all on his own. Anyway, it's just a four year old's artwork. But I was impressed. I'll add it here for your viewing pleasure as well. Note the burning building on the left. No detail was missed.

And my Punky. That boy is such a pleasure. He's just so sweet and loving. He was so huggy today with me. I am so glad he is still like that. He does his own work without complaint and more often than not will find a chore of someone else's and do it for them just to be nice. He helps Goose when Goose needs someone to fix a toy or reach something he can't on his own. He has interesting things to say and intriguing questions to ask. And he is just so handsome. He's lean and his skin is perfect. He has beautiful brown eyes and a face that lights up with his smile. He looks so much like his father that it's almost eery. I just can't believe sometimes how much he is like a little man now. From his chiseled face and his muscular flat stomach to his probing questions and intuitive awareness. And he's only six. But if, by chance, I am ever fooled for a moment by his maturity, I am quickly reminded of his tender age by his constant motion and his weird, loud boy noises that seem to punctuate every action he makes in life. Isn't it wonderful how big and how small one can be at the same time?

So anyway, I am just busily drinking in all the wonder and sweetness of my darlings. They have just melted away any vestiges of my blues from last week. I love watching them play together. I love how all three of my boys melt when they see their baby sister and cannot go past her without stopping to say hi and give her a kiss or a hug or a kind word. I love how Goose follows Finny and Punky around and how they usually welcome him along for the ride. I love how I can scoop any one of them up and hug and kiss and tickle them until they can hardly breath, and no one complains about it or fights it. I love that when her Daddy walks by Girly Pie will smile and reach out for him, and he will in turn break into an ear splitting grin and grab her and snuggle her right up to his chest. And then she looks at me with a very satisfied expression, as if to share her glee with me. I love how all the boys clamor to tackle their Daddy when he walks through the door. And how he falls to the floor to let them do it.

Ahh. Life is oh so sweet.

Blue

I'm a little blue today. I just have days where it all seems so fleeting. I love this time, my children so small and still needing me so much. I love this time in life, this season. The vast majority of the time I feel so blessed in this day that I do not look ahead to tomorrow, when the unknown will come. But I have days now and then where I let the fears of tomorrow creep in and whisper in my ear.

Today and yesterday have been like that I guess.


Will it be OK when my kids are grown and don't need me anymore? Will I know who I am then? Can I be someone besides Punky, Finny, Goose and Girly Pie's mom?


I don’t know.


But I'll get over it. By the end of today I'll be right back in Psalm 118:24... This is the day the LORD has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.

But for the moment, I'm wondering about tomorrow and being a little sad for the yesterdays gone by.

My Finny will be five in January, you know. I'm not ready for that one to get big, I think. He's my soft spot. I can't imagine a world without a Little Finny in it. But that world is creeping up on me so much faster than I am ready for. He'll be big soon enough. His cute little toddler and preschooler ways will fade away and the bigger, older, more mature Finny will take that place.

So I am just fighting the natural progression of things today.

Anyway. Not sure why I shared all that. Maybe you understand. Maybe not. I know I cherish these young years a lot, possibly more than most people. So maybe it is easier for some as their babies grow into children and finally adults. But for me, it's tough to let them go. And I homeschool, so it's not even like they're physically going anywhere! ;o) It's just hard sometimes to watch who they were disappear as who they were created to be takes shape, you know?

OK, enough of that. Off I go to bake brownies with my biggest boy. Our Friday baking time together. Time to just soak in all of today that I can.

Rainy days

So, am I a bad mom for staying home today with Goose and Girly Pie while my Man takes Finny and Punky to town for their soccer games? Their games are at 9:30am and 1:15pm. And we live about a 25 minute drive from the fields. So that means we have to stay in town for the vast majority of the day for soccer. EVERY SATURDAY.

And it's raining. And Goose and Girly Pie need naps. And that's just a long time to hang out in town with 4 kids, half of whom are tired and cranky and needing naps. In the rain.

Did I mention it's raining? I think I must just be a bad mom. Well, no. I'm a good mom. But a bad soccer mom.

I do feel bad. I mean, I love watching my boys play and cheering them on. I really like to be there.

But... It's raining...

Girly Pie and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

(Big sigh)

I forgot how hard a day can be when one of your babies is really, really sad.

Sure I've had plenty of tantrum-throwing-defiance-filled days with my Darling Goose lately. Part and parcel of life with a two year old. But that's kinda sorta his own thing, you know? I feel bad for the kid, but that's his job - to test the limits and see what happens.

But my poor, poor little Girly Pie has had just a horrible day today. She's normally just happy to be along for the ride. If she's hungry, I nurse her, and she's happy. If she's tired, I snuggle up with her and nurse her to sleep, and she's happy. If she's a little grumpy, I carry her around in the Moby wrap, and she's happy. If she's feeling too confined, I let her roll around on the floor, and she's happy. Do you see the repeating theme here?

HAPPY. Girly Pie is normally very HAPPY.

But today? No. My Girly Pie is not happy today. My Girly Pie is just plain old sad.

She hasn't wanted to nurse, she hasn't wanted to play, she even cries when I carry her in the wrap. Every time I get her down for a nap, she wakes up crying again within 10 minutes. It's just not like her. And I feel so bad for her!

Two of my three boys had teeth by 5 months, so I'm suspecting that is playing a part in this. Her first teeth are likely working their way up today in a way she understandably is not tolerating too well. But still. I just want my sweet baby girl to be happy and feel better.

So today I am praying for peace and rest for my sweet Girly Pie. It is just so hard to see someone so innocent and helpless feel so bad.

I finally found some Tylenol and gave her her first does of drugs in her sweet little life. And she is taking her first real nap of the day.

So, thank you Lord for acetaminophen.

Brotherly Love

I find myself wondering today just how much of an effect our family dynamic will have on our children as they grow into adulthood.

We have four small children, all two years apart, give or take. Each time we have added a new person to our family, each of the older siblings has taken it completely in stride. We’ve never had the sibling jealousy or any acting out by older kids as the new baby takes on the new role of baby of the house. I’ve heard that there can be issues in families when new babies come, but we’ve never dealt with that in any tangible way ourselves. Our new babies are always loved, the bigger kids shuffle a bit to find a new comfortable spot to fill, and we all just move forward together. I just take for granted, I suppose, that my children will love one another and that they will enjoy each other’s company and get along well.

Now of course they have their bickering moments, even their weeks or months of a certain pair of children not getting along too terribly well, but those times are few and far between and are always short lived.

So in all my wonderings, it is more about how they are TOGETHER that fills my mind. I’ve not really taken the time to look at how they will do APART from one another. Today, I got to see just a glimpse of that side of the multiple sibling coin.

Today, four of our six family members needed to see the dentist. The two big boys needed basic checkups, and my Man and I needed some more extensive examinations done to look at what damage we’d done in our young adult lives of neglectful brushing and flossing. We knew that with all four of us getting checked, it would be a long visit. Girly Pie is still nursing full time and she is also very happy to be along for the ride, so we happily brought her along. But, being blessed to live close to a wonderful family we full trust with out children, we decided that leaving two year old Goose behind was the best plan.

If any of you have two year olds, you may understand this decision. Goose is a delight, full of life and energy and personality in spades. He’s got a wonderful sense of humor for such a wee fellow and he really is a hoot to be around.

All that being said, he’s not one who can be counted on to be anywhere near still or quiet for more than a few minutes. And he's as unpredictable as heck, that one.

So we left Goose with my best friend Mary Grace, figuring he’d play all day with his best bud Oliver and he’d be happy as a clam. We rarely leave our kids with anyone, but Mary Grace was there for Goose’s birth. She’s changed his diapers, wiped his snotty nose, held him, hugged him and loved him for his whole little life. I knew he was in good hands and I thought he’d have a great day.

Apparently, I was wrong.

When I called MG after our appointments were over (about 4 hours after we dropped Goose off at her house) she said in the most PC way possible that he had not been “happy.” By not happy, what she really meant was that he had thrown a complete toddler meltdown fit when he realized I was gone, then continued to spend the majority of the morning clinging ferociously to Oliver’s toys and hording them into corners to avoid anyone taking them away. He apparently demanded snacks in a most un-Benny-approved way (of course at our house he knows to ask nicely, but at a friend’s house he points and yells for the desired banana, then drops to the floor in a temper when asked to say it nicely) and was pretty well a grump for any part of the day that was not punctuated with either Diego or The Wiggles.

Now, Goose is temperamental at times, I’ll admit. He is two years old, and boy, can he be a two year old! That child is thoroughly testing our patience and calm these days, in between wooing us with his utter charm and cuteness. He’s just so full of… I can’t even think of the words to describe it. He’s just FULL. His cup runneth over with just about everything you can put in it. ;o)
But today he really was in a good mood. And normally when he’s around other people, particularly people he likes like MG and crew, he’s just a delight. So in talking about his out of character behavior at her house today, she and I both realized that it was most likely the lack of his big brothers that pushed him over the edge, so to speak.

Goose came into this world with a loving mother and father, and two adoring older brothers. He has never known a world without Punky and Finny. Anywhere that boy goes, he goes with a whole crew of peers right by his side. If he’s sad, Punky knows how to help him. If he’s lonely, Finny is always happy to sit with him and play side by side. If he’s feeling unsure about anything, they give him the confidence to get him through, even when Mommy or Daddy are not within arms reach to do for him what we did for Punky and even Finny when they were smaller. His world is not really just his own. Everything he experiences is colored by having his brothers there with him. So today, when Mommy wasn’t there, he also didn’t have big brothers to look to for reassurance that he was OK. He couldn’t see them playing happily, thus feel confident that everything was indeed fine. It was like a part of his own body was missing today. So even though he was in a place he normally finds very comfortable with people he knows almost as well as his own family, he just wasn’t himself… because as far as he was concerned, not all of himself was there.

So all this to say, I wonder if that will make up a part of who Goose is as an adult. Will he ever really feel happy to be alone? Will he feel incomplete when he and his brothers begin to go out into the world separately as young adult men? Will he lack coping skills that others might develop, simply because he has learned to just look to his brothers to cope with difficult situations?

So I just wonder. Mostly I feel like it’s all good. I feel like the bonds they are making will be wonderful over the years. My children will have hard times in their lives just the same as anyone else. And I think that the fact that they will have each other to lean on in those hard times is a huge gift. There may be a cost, but in the end, I feel it will be well worth any cost they might find.

And, when it comes right down to it, I suppose there is not really much I can do about it anyway. Our family is what it is. And I wouldn’t want to change it even if I could.

I guess next time I need to leave Goose behind for some reason, I just need to leave a big brother (or two) behind, as well. ;o)