Quality time

Isn't it funny how your perspective changes with age? And have you noticed how your perspective changes even more as the number of children in your family increases?

I only mention this random observation after an evening spent with only two of my four children. Normally the post-dinner/bedtime routine is a bit of a blur.

Now don't get me wrong... bedtime is, as a general rule, one of my favorite times of day with my family. I love being the one to tuck my kids in each night and watch as the events of the day slip away into the comfort and security of their beds. I love peeking in on them as they doze off. After several years of nannying, I can tell you there is nothing sweeter than being the one who not only gets to go through the blessings as well as the hardships of each day, but also gets to be the final kiss, the last voice heard each night... and the first smile they see each morning.

But tonight, my Man was out running soccer practice with our big boys, Punky and Finny. While they were gone, it was just me, Goose and Girly Pie. And as I sat there in the relative quiet of the bathroom watching two comparatively small children splashing and smiling in the tub, I was amazed at the peace of it all... The quiet, the calm...

I remember when Finny was born how much busier things got going from one to two. I loved it... I adored watching the sibling relationship unfold. In fact I never really hit much transitioning trouble at all with the two of them. But I do remember things just being busier and I had to work a bit to have quiet moments with each of them.

But tonight, having two be half the normal number rather than double as it was years ago, it hit me how it's really my perspective, more than my children, that has changed. Those quiet moments are a little harder to come by with four small hearts looking to you to be filled up constantly through the day. But they are there, if I can just open my eyes and see them. So when they do appear, I have come to realize that I must take those moments and really enjoy them. Luxuriate in them.

So tonight, with just the younger set present, that is just what I did.

The two Littles enjoyed a long, coolish bath together. Then Goose and I got to read his favorite Truck book at a leisurely pace, lingering on each page and looking in detail at each large truck pictured. When he had to go potty, I actually got to sit there with him and keep him company the whole time (with the truck book, of course), a luxury that really only my first born ever really got to enjoy much in his life. We sang songs and played together. We brushed teeth like the big boys, and Goose even tried to spit like they do in the sink. Goose got to snuggle extra in his bed when I tucked him in, and he was quite happy and relaxed as I kissed him goodnight.

Then I got to go downstairs with a happy, wakeful girl who was so eager to give me her full ear-to-ear smile, with that heart melting sparkle in her sweet blue eyes. She clearly loved having my full, uninterrupted attention all to herself.

These are all moments that I get small tastes of throughout each day. But tonight I got the full meal deal with my two littlest ones.

And it was delicious.